Feelings....

A bit weird today. My sister's ex-husband died yesterday. He was only in his early 40's. However, his body had been really put through so much with his active alcoholic life that included 2 terrible car accidents, a 9-week comatose state in his 20's after one of the accidents and culminating in him being the victim of a horrific tavern beating after going back to alcohol again. This time, there was no coming out of the coma that he's been in for 4 months. With a change of status by the doctor to a hospice level, the tube-feeding could be removed. It was removed last Friday. His decline was rather quick.

I didn't have contact with him for years, but would hear that "he's sober right now"...then "he's drinking again" and it was always evident that my niece, his only child, wanted to distance herself from his behavior. Unfortunately, she being 18 yrs old and an adult, came to be named his "guardian" in this last hospitalization. I think of my own father, who I've always been proud of, and wonder what were and are her feelings about her paternal origin?

So, I plan on visiting if there is a service for him to support my niece. I hope that she can feel some closure on the relationship, without feeling guilty at the relief this death may bring her. We are Christians and he was instructed about his Savior, Jesus and openly professed that knowledge. Unbeknownst to me, he had served lunch to the school children of a nearby church for a couple of years and the Pastor offered the school children to sing at the funeral. I know this brings me comfort and I pray it brings my niece and sister comfort as well.

I guess it shouldn't be surprising that my day is a bit weird today given the circumstances but I'm focused on continuing on my healthy road.

Funny, it's one day at a time for me too, as well as the alcoholic... Our drugs of choice are just different...

Take care of yourselves today, for youself and the people who love you.

Blessings and Happiness,
Margaret